A searchable, downloadable PDF of the original article appears below. Dr. David Sherbino is a professor at Ontario Theological Seminary, Toronto, and was the speaker at the Fall Renewal Day at Nobleton, Ontario.
Most of us are aware that many of the real problems in life are relational. All around us we see people destroying each other, being hostile, critical or just plain contentious. But we also know that Jesus Christ came into this world to enable people to experience closer relationships with each other and with God. In fact God has revealed in Scripture — and continues to reveal in daily life — principles that show us how to cooperate with him, in the releasing of life, the healing of relationships, the liberation of people, and the reconciliation that is needed in many relationships.
These principles need to be applied to the four essential relationships in our life. First we need to evaluate the relationship we have with God. This primary relationship is not established by simply having correct theological concepts. Essentially it involves accepting the good news of God’s unconditional love in Jesus Christ, and responding to that love by committing as much of myself to as much of God as I understand.
The second relationship that needs to be examined is the relationship we have with ourself. Most people are usually aware of their sins and failures but it is the gospel that brings us a message of hope. The promise of God is that in Jesus Christ we are becoming new creations, the old patterns of life are passing away and everything is becoming new. As the Holy Spirit enables us to experience that promise as a reality in our lives, we can celebrate what God is doing. The changes we see occurring day by day make us aware that the life of Jesus is being formed within us and this in itself leads to a new appreciation of who we are in Jesus Christ.
“The Significant Other”, that is, the people we relate to on a daily or regular basis, is the third relationship. Your family members, co-workers and those within your faith community would fall into this category. How wonderful if the church could be the place where you could let down your hair, be open with each other, have someone to admit your faults to and still have them put their arms around you and tell you that you are still okay.
The gospel reveals that God showed his vulnerability at the cross, and calls us to risk in our relationships.
Most people will not take such risks. In some instances we want to remain respectable, in other instances folk simply keep us at arm’s length. Thus we continue to live out our days wearing a facade that hides the loneliness and desperation that we never share. These relationships are far from the concept of fellowship that Jesus had in mind. Bruce Larson and Keith Miller in their book The Edge of Adventure makes this comment:
“The neighborhood bar is possibly the best counterfeit there is to the fellowship Christ wants to give his church. It’s an imitation, dispensing liquor instead of grace, escape rather than reality, but it is a permissive, accepting, and inclusive fellowship. It is unshockable. It is democratic. You can tell people secrets and they usually don’t tell others or even want to. The bar flourishes not because most people are alcoholics, but because God has put into the human heart the desire to know and be known, to love and be loved, and so many seek a counterfeit at the price of a few beers.
“With all my heart I believe that Christ wants his church to be … a fellowship where people can come in and say ‘I’m sunk!’ ‘I’ve had it!’ ”
The gospel reveals that God showed his vulnerability at the cross, and calls us to risk in our relationships. It is costly but I know of no other way to build relationships of significance, unless they are prepared to love as Jesus did.
Finally Christ calls us to become involved in the world. It has been estimated that within two years of becoming a Christian most believers are caught up with Christian activities to the extent that they may have no non-Christian friends they relate to in a significant way. It is only as we become sensitive to the needs of others can we respond to them in the name of Jesus. As we become involved with others we bear witness to the truth that God desires to become involved with us. We need to be converted back into the world.
Tragically, we have heard that the church has ceased to be relevant. This is simply another way of saying we are not meeting the needs of people. Is it true? Is the bulk of your church ministry spent on programs or on people? I do not believe people want more programs but they desire life-changing relationships. Therefore I encourage you to give of yourself and to join with others who desire to live out the implications of the gospel in the way that was incarnated in Jesus.